Shinyshiny – simply the second hour, not new music to my library – part 2
Written by Agent 47 on October 28, 2017
Shinyshiny . This blog post continues a longer thread regarding writing, purpose and allowing the brain to get in the way. Featuring a playlist originally streamcast on the 1st of October, 2017
PreScript : with the utmost respect to @distantrecords (you can find her on twitter) this is an honest assessment of the city of Los Angeles. To back up a bit and refresh the ramble, the previous paragraph:
I am from the state of Texas originally, and had been living there; in the capitol city of Austin to be exact, when I took a year to live in the Golden State on the Left Coast. Our (as Oregonians) southern and reviled neighbor. I had gone out to California with the hopes of accomplishing a few things.
(1) I wanted to repair a relationship with my mother. This relationship has long been quite strained and often utterly broken. Alas, if you really want to help affect change upon something you must be prepared to take initiative, action. You can’t just light candles and hope and pray for outcomes. It just doesn’t work that way.
(2) Within the process of staying with her, I was hoping to save up a small nest egg with which I could push the reset button on what had become, a very cast to the wind kind of life. The grand plan included finally formally completing my GED, and then back in Texas going to school and begin co-habitation with a young lady I had known since middle school. We were quite smitten with each other, but had never been in a relationship, always in some strange kind of holding pattern. There was always something in the way, soda speak. Now however, with a toddler that she had had out of wedlock, she was ready to give us a try, and I was prepared to commit to adulting and parenting a child I had no legitimate responsibility for.
(3) I wanted to sniff out the evil party version of New York.
New York is hard and difficult, wondrous and alive, creative. Vibrant in everything. It is the epitome of an older America and still very much a media/cultural/educational/political/business hub of the American fabric. Los Angeles is the dream fugue state of this conscious reality. While just as hard and difficult, it is also full of “good weather” and sunny outdoor distractions, right in the middle of a sprawling megalopolis. LA is the epitome of the unreal, make believe and wholesale fabrication. It is the American reality in an advanced state of a crippling illness. The fatal form of the malignant illness that could best be slapped with a simple moniker of Spiritual Necrotic Denial.